My glass is neither half full nor half empty. My glass is a glass that contains 50% the amount of liquid from its original point of consumption. Nothing more, nothing less. I’m not an optimist or a pessimist, I’m a realist.

I never want to be a naïve person who dances through life believing that nothing bad can ever happen. The reality is that bad things happen, everyday. Loved ones die, spouses cheat, children get sick, people you trust screw you over, there are natural disasters, we lose pets, jobs and friends, we get old and grow apart. Life is constantly throwing us curveballs and if we aren’t prepared for them or able to adapt, then we are asking for a world of hurt and pain when the balls start flying. Of course there are some tragedies that occur that we can never prepare for or fathom. My point is, it’s silly to think that our whole world can’t capsize at any given moment in time. The reality is that it can and probably will.

I also don’t care to live my life as a cynic, unable to appreciate the blessings of the world I live in, the freedoms of our country, the focus on what I do have instead of what I don’t. As a writer especially, I strive to recognize the beauty of things. Nature’s rhythms and patterns, the universe’s sense of humor, hellos and goodbyes, the beauty of tradition, the beauty in flaws, a sunset, a long passionate kiss, a stolen moment. For as many bad things that happen, I realize there are just as many good, sometimes more. Marriages do last, babies are born into the world with the hope and promise of making it a better place. And if we are very lucky, we are blessed with friends, health, laughter, and will never be given more hardships than we can endure at once. That is also reality.

I hate when people ask me if my glass is half full or half empty because in my mind, they are asking me to choose between reality and fantasy. They are asking me to stop feeling what I’m feeling. Maybe I need that thought or feeling even if it’s a negative one because I know it will ultimately help me get to the next place. I’m not afraid to go to dark places because I know that you have to stumble through a dark room in order to find the light switch. I don’t want to be someone who is afraid to confront the bad or embrace the good. I believe there should be a healthy balance of both. Things can’t be good all the time and they can’t be bad all the time. So why force yourself to feel one when the other is your current reality?

It’s just not that black and white in my world, life is messy and there is a lot of gray. So how could it be as simple as full or empty? Why does it have to be one or the other, why can’t it just be what it is? A fucking glass that is either more full than more empty depending on how much shit we are dealing with at the time we are drinking out of the glass? And whether that shit is good shit or bad shit, knowing that our daily perspective can all change tomorrow along with the next curveball and new shit that gets thrown our way? Shit that we can’t ever really prepare for.

I think we were meant to feel pain and endure hardships because they make us stronger. Because if only good things happened all the time then we would become greedy and grow to expect it like a spoiled rich kid who always gets what he wants. When things are bad and we feel that our wills are being tested, that is when we build strength and character, we are sculpting the emotional muscles that will be necessary to help us fight the next battle and kick its ass. Then when the good starts to outweigh the bad again -- the drink tastes sweeter because there is more to be savored and enjoyed.

Here's to 2006 bringing you a heap of pleasant realities and a healthy balance to your life.